🔗 Share this article

“Well, it’s rather brutal here. The guidance we offer all of our clients to invest all their resources into canned food and shotguns.” That bit of wise counsel comes from the Brain Gremlin – a lab-engineered, talking, spectacled member of the slimy Gremlin horde that overruns Manhattan’s high-tech Clamp Tower skyscraper in director Joe Dante’s madcap sequel Gremlins 2: The New Batch. On the surface, it’s simply an financial suggestion from one monster to another. However, in a strange manner, it’s also pretty solid life guidance. Truly, listen to my reasoning.

When situations deteriorate, the worst thing you can do is approach matters with excessive gravity. The Brain Gremlin grasps this. In fact, a large portion of the fang-bearing creatures that populate Dante’s chaotic 1990 feature (arguably his best) possess the same sly, self-aware comic sensibility regarding the indistinct border separating everyday life and absolute bedlam. It’s a single component of Gremlins 2: The New Batch that keeps me coming back – and the older I get, it’s the theme that strikes the deepest chord.

An Early Life Fixation

Understandably, my connection with this movie did not begin on such an introspective level. As a child, we possessed merely a few well-worn videocassettes at home. Among them were Gremlins and its second chapter, the latter housed in a bulky previously-rented case likely purchased from an off-brand video shop and boasting growling monsters on its tattered front. I was right away smitten and these films quickly proceeded lodging themselves inside my tiny, impressionable mind. Henceforth, they became an almost-daily part of my youthful watching schedule.

Dante’s first film usually receives all the plaudits, thanks primarily due to its legacy as a semi-scary seasonal fave – and to be fair, I’ve watched Gremlins on countless occasions. That said, its sequel infrequently obtains the same level of lofty appreciation, which feels unjust. As a kid, I’d always seize the chance to watch Gremlins 2. During long summer holidays, I’d lock myself inside and stick it on. When I got my own TV-VHS combo unit, it stayed in constant rotation in my bedroom. Over time, it became deeply rooted in my mental framework. If my parents observed this fixation, they appeared unbothered.

Deeper Discoveries and Pop-Culture Nuggets

As I got older, new revelations enriched multiple watches, amplifying the pleasure of watching little green monsters happily vandalize a New York high-rise. I learned the future-focused property magnate and Clamp Tower owner, Daniel Clamp (John Glover), was inspired directly by the eventual commander-in-chief Donald Trump, with his ginger staff member Marla (Haviland Morris) echoing his one-time partner Marla Maples. Fortunately, Clamp demonstrates more humanity than his real-life counterpart.

The “doomsday” video Clamp plays during the height of creature carnage? I discovered it was modeled after a genuine “Doomsday” video produced by the CNN boss Ted Turner should the world truly faced apocalypse. I noticed how Dante took extra pains to film different iterations of a meta sequence where Gremlins take over the exact movie you are viewing. One for cinemas, another for home video and television, each delivering a smirking slice of self-referential entertainment sorcery before the term was even a thing.

A Persistent Appeal

While it was effects expert Rick Baker’s wonderfully grotesque creatures that captured my attention as a child, this deeper gold maintained my fascination as an adult. In time, I even interviewed Dante about it myself and he had no reservations telling me he made the movie with the direct intention of poking fun at those who loved its absurd-yet-genuine predecessor and craved further installments. “We were going to make fun of the fact you came to see it,” he happily revealed. This Looney Tunes-esque insubordination and resolve to not take his sequel as seriously as his Warner Bros bosses evidently expected, only deepened my appreciation further.

When I experienced a unexpected loss in the family earlier this year, I was taken aback to discover that, during my most profound sorrow, all I felt compelled to do was sit and watch Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Strange, isn’t it? Maybe not. The comforting familiarity it provided was necessary to dilute my mind’s sadness sludge – but the stuff it had imparted to me as an adult were equally valuable.

Like Gremlins rampaging through a genetics laboratory, there’s particular aspects in life you just can’t control. Dante knows it. The Brain Gremlin knows it too. Sometimes, you have to emulate them: embrace the chaos, invest all your resources into canned food and shotguns and try not to take things too seriously.

It’s powerful existential guidance from a most improbable origin – and it’s why Gremlins 2: The New Batch will eternally stand as my go-to cinematic solace.